Once your divorce is final, you are no longer part of a couple and are now a single parent. This will bring about a lot of changes in your life, and you are going to notice some of these changes dramatically when you take your child or children on your first vacation as a single parent. It can be overwhelming when taking your first vacation as a single parent, but it is very doable and also allows you to have more one-on-one time with your children. The key to having a great vacation is to be organized and you will be able to relax and make it a great family vacation for all of you.

Get the Kids Involved With Vacation Plans

One of the main things that can make a vacation harder after a divorce is that it is painfully obvious to the children that they no longer have their parents together. This can make kids act out which in turn can make a vacation seem more like a nightmare. So what can you do? Involve the kids in the vacation as much as possible. You want them to feel as though they are an important part of the vacation, and this can help them cope better with the fact that their parents are no longer together.

Here are some ideas to help kids get involved with vacation plans:

• Let the kids help with navigation, whether this means letting one child be in charge of the navigator or letting one child look at the map
• Plan the route that you are taking together so that the kids feel like this is more than just a vacation that you have planned for them
• Allow the kids to help decide where you are stopping to eat, which will help them remember this vacation as one in which they played a big part
• Listen to the ideas the kids have about where they want to go and what they want to do. If they feel as though this is their vacation as well as yours, they are going to be happier in the long run

Acknowledge you are a Single Parent

It is not good to go into this vacation without acknowledging that you are a single parent now, so things are going to change. This is a new experience for you and for your children. While you are getting the kids involved to help them feel more comfortable with your vacation, also take the time to realize that the vacation is going to be different for you as well. Here are some ideas to keep in mind:

• You are going to be handling all the adult decisions from this point forward
• Make your vacation something that is not high stress, as you have enough stress to deal with as it is
• Reach out to other single parents for some advice and help if you feel as though this situation is getting out of hand

Getting a divorce and then parenting your children on your own is an adjustment. However, it is one which you can get through easier by involving the kids. It will take time, but in the end you will find that being single and happy with your children is much better for all of you than struggling and being unhappy in a marriage that is not working.

When parents are sharing custody of their child, it can make the holidays feel even more hectic. Timesharing during the holidays can be very stressful, and not just for the parents – often the stress and tension the parents feel is transferred to the children. This is why it is important to remember that the holidays should be about the children. Parents should do whatever is necessary to ensure that their children are not feeling the stress that has come from the parents no longer being together.
With this being said, there are several things you can do to ensure that everyone has a good holiday:
Make sure you have an agreed-upon schedule in place before the holidays. In most cases, the Court will have a recommended schedule for you to follow. Both parents should be following the schedule from the Court or agree on one together so that the children get just as much time with both parents and their families as possible.

Have you considered celebrating together? This is something many parents are able to do if their divorce was one in which feelings weren’t hurt, or when enough time has passed to allow both parents to heal. This can make the holidays much better for the children.

Don’t Force Your Kids Choose

Never make the children choose who they want to spend with during the holidays. It is not fair to them to make them choose, and it can cause bad feelings for everyone. Instead, work together to make sure the children get to see both parents equally.

Communication is Key to Scheduling the Holidays

Always check with each other to ensure that your plans with your family do not conflict with their plans. This can be a huge issue during the holidays. Communication between parents is the key.
As a parent, you need to realize that timesharing during the holidays is going to require both parents to compromise. You need to be flexible and realize that neither of you are going to get 100% of the time with the children.

When your kids are with the other parent, instead of feeling depressed and lonely, focus instead on your family and support system. Also, the holidays are stressful and it is important to have a little ‘me time’ whenever you can.

Consider New Traditions to Minimize Stress

Timesharing during the holidays can be complicated and stressful. It is important to understand that some of the traditions you enjoyed before the divorce may not be possible any more. However, you now get to create new traditions with your children and family that you will have for many years to come.

If you have questions related to Child Custody and Timesharing, Contact Jacksonville divorce attorney Wendy Norman at 904.306.9926.

When a divorce happens, feelings and emotions are high. However, when children are involved, it is important that the Court evaluate both parents and consider their mental health and ability to care for their children, and determine what is in the best interests of the children. The State of Florida no longer awards one parent custody of the children; instead, there are parenting plans which include timesharing schedules. One parent may have the children more than the other, or the parents may have equal time with the children. Because the Court must determine what timesharing schedule is in the best interests of the children, many times a social investigation will be performed.

The Basics of a Social Investigation and Child Custody

This type of investigation is usually performed by a mental health professional, one who has no prior relationship with either of the parties or the children. The Social Investigator is a neutral and impartial third party, thus his or her opinions and recommendations will carry great weight with the Court. The Social Investigator will evaluate both parents, including their lifestyles, and make a recommendation as to which parent the children would be better off spending more of their time with, or if the children should spend equal time with the parents. The Social Investigator will outline all of his or her findings and recommendations in a report that is presented to the Court. In addition, he or she will submit a proposed parenting plan that best fits the needs of the children.

Assessments during a Social Investigation and Parenting Plans

During a social investigation many things will be considered and reviewed by the Social Investigator, including the following:

• Background checks, checks of police records and the like concerning both parents
• Interviews with the children are conducted
• Interviews with both parents
• Character references submitted by both parents are interviewed
• Doctors, employers, and other professionals are interviewed about the parents and children

Once these assessments are made, the report and parenting plan are then drawn up, and include findings and recommendations by the Social Investigator.

How this Affects Timesharing Agreement

Since the social investigation is such a huge component of the parenting plan and timesharing schedule, the findings and recommendations of the Social Investigator will have a huge effect on the final timeshare plan. In most cases, the Court agrees with the Social Investigator and implements the recommended parenting plan and timesharing schedule.
For those who are going through a divorce or who are arranging a timesharing schedule, Wendy Norman is a family attorney who has been practicing in the Jacksonville area for over 15 years. She has had many cases involving social investigations and can help you prepare for what is to come. Simply give her a call today to discuss your case!

It is that time of year again, back to school. For many parents who share the custody of their child, this can be a time of turmoil. The goal for the new school year for both parents should be to minimize the changes that the child may have now that summer vacation is over. And to keep both parents happy, all custody arrangements should be something that you can both stick to and follow. In the end, it is all about the child or children, and both parents should do whatever they can to make the school year a happy one.

For those parents getting ready for the new school year, here are 4 tips to help manage the time-sharing more easily:

1. Be consistent
This means that you should still follow the regular schedule, with the child spending nights with each parent. If you have a schedule from last school year that worked, then use it again. If not, then stick to the time-sharing schedule the two of you agreed upon in your parenting plan.

2. Communicate with one another
In many situations, parents do not communicate with each other as much as they should. Remember, you are both parents of your child and you are going to have to communicate with each other in order to ensure that the needs of your child are met. With the advancement of technology, you don’t really have to talk, you can email or even text message one another. These can be great ways to let the other parent know that you are picking the child up from their after school program, you are running late, or the like.

3. Open a line of communication with the teacher
Unfortunately, depending on the time-sharing schedule, many times one parent is left out when it comes to what is going on in the classroom on a day-to-day basis. That is why it is important for both parents to be involved and communicate with the teacher. This also means ensuring that the school has both parents’ contact information and that information being sent from the school is going to both parents.

4. Keep track of the money spent for school expenses (clothes, school supplies, lunch money, etc.)
Money can be a huge issue when time-sharing is involved, as the child is going to need money for school on a regular basis in most cases. This is another reason why it is so important for parents to talk to each other, and keep each other informed about these expenses and keep track of who is buying what for the child.

As an experienced divorce attorney in Jacksonville, Florida, Wendy Norman can help parents to figure out what the best method is for children when involved in a time-sharing situation. Whether this means going to court to set a schedule or simply sitting down with one or the other parent, the responsibilities associated with raising a child can be handled.